?

Log in

Angsty like a teen right now lol blaaaaah - My Mind Says... [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Bonnie

[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ archive | journal archive ]

Angsty like a teen right now lol blaaaaah [Jan. 8th, 2011|03:50 pm]
Bonnie
[mood |frustratedfrustrated]
[music |Zappa]

I feel like... mad at my family that I haven't been since I was a teen dude. Fuckin angst style too... pisses me off.

FIRST of all, I don't get to go to a 4 year. If I would have been allowed to go the first year I could have had a better schedule allowing me to finish within atleast 5 years there, instead of a possible 7 overall college years... fucking transferring didn't help at all either. Credits got confused, and HFCC didn't prepare me for shit. My parents learn the hard way on me and allow Beverly to go to a four year her first year. Which is great that they can learn, because she definitally doesn't need to go through that and Betty couldn't have gone to a community college with her degree because NOTHING would have transferred. That's fine, I get that, I by chance got the shitty end of the stick on that story nobody's fault really we didn't know.

Here's the part I'm pissed about: Betty gets a brand new car because she graduated (lucky... I could have soon too if I could have hat her opportunity to go to a 4 year my first year) and Beverly gets to keep MY old room that I gave to her because she's "cleaner?" and they are saing THEY gave it to her now and I didn't? NOT true. I felt Beverly deserved that room when I left because I wasn't going to be in it, and she was in highschool and needed more privacy and I thought I wasn't comming back but for summers. Now she will only be here months at a time and I have to stay in Dearborn because I can't go to State anymore... I don't even want to be here... and my sisters get cars and big rooms and I'm stuck in the kiddy room with mickey and bunk-beds? No. Come on. Really? Shit and the only reason the room I'm in right now is a mess is because it's too small and I hate it it's ugly and I don't care what it looks like because it's rediculous I couldn't be comfortable in there if I wanted with those bunkbeds and no space. My drawing pad doesn't even fit on the floor without any mess! I can't even sit up on those beds I'm too tall... and my old room was a bit messy-very messy depending on stuff because everyone's toys are in my closets and years of shit accumulate and take up space... plus me being 16 didn't help either. I would be SO happy to have that room back. The only thing that's ever on my floor is clothes anyways, it's really not that terrible.

So I'm deciding between staying here with these fucktards or moving out and probably taking LOTS MORE years to finish school because I'd have to work a ton more... and they won't let me take the shitty car they "let me use" (it's falling to pieces and no one uses it but me anyways) if i moved SO I'd be stuck in the Brady (a.k.a. "Shady") Apartments because it's close enough to my school and my job (or hopefully a different job down that street because I can't stand it at Andiamo either it's full of ass holes who work there and the customers are snobby bitches and shit... ugh).

I am not happy and I want to run away. Sadly I know that would just be stupid too.
linkReply